A Purely Hypothetical Situation

Imagine with me, if you will, a mother and her sweet, pre-school age son. They are walking hand in hand through a massive furniture store, looking for the perfect couch. They have been playing a spirited game of 'I Spy' and the little boy is surprisingly compliant, considering that couch shopping is quite possibly the thing he hates most in the world.

For some reason, known only to other 4-year-old children, the boy decides that dragging his rubber-toed shoes on the laminate floor is a fun thing to do. It causes strange vibrations in his toes and makes a rather silly sound, not unlike that of a distasteful bodily function.

Suddenly, the little boy decides this is not entertaining enough and says, in a voice audible across the universe,

"MOMMY, WHY ARE YOU FARTING?"

The horrified mother hisses, "That sound is your shoes, silly!"

"NO, YOU ARE FARTING!"

The little boy dissolves into hysterical giggles as the mother looks around for a couch big enough to hide behind forever. The poor, poor mother.

There is not a sink hole on this planet big enough to save one from that situation, were it to actually happen.

To Do List

I have had a 3-mile long To Do List since we moved here. In the last few weeks I've shortened the list considerably but there are still a few things that must be done and must be done very soon. If they don't get done, the To Do List demon is going to continue terrorizing me and send me completely over the edge into insanity.

I can't seem to focus on the few remaining things on my list. I am not sure why this is. Maybe because they are tedious chores that no one wants to do ever, much less when they are new to a major metropolitan area and don't know where anything is. Anyway, no one else is going to do them for me and since I can't stay focused, I'm posting my To Do List here. You could gently (gently!) remind me to do some of these things if they stay on the list too long.

1. Register my vehicle in Colorado
2. Register myself as a licensed driver in Colorado
3. Pick a daycare for Samuel and enroll him
4. Buy a couch
5. Get a library card
6. Get vehicle maintenance done
7. Find a family doctor/nurse practitioner and dentist
8. Finish remaining documentation for nursing license application
9. Continue plugging away at the never-ending homework
10. Contest false insurance claim attached to my name from last year (yeah, a lot of fun that's going to be.)

It feels better to have it all written out. Maybe now I won't spend 20 minutes reciting the list to myself when I go to bed. I hate that. It's the only time I spend thinking about all the stuff I didn't get done during the day and then I remember things I hadn't even considered that needed to be done. Wow, I'm tired.
I do derive a bit -- okay, a lot! -- of personal satisfaction from knowing that I have accomplished a hell of a lot since arriving here, though. Let's review:

1. Apply for nursing license
2. Find a job
3. Enroll children in school
4. Move into apartment
5. Familiarize myself with major streets
6. Unpack a U-Haul's worth of stuff
7. File tax return
8. Find a proctor for my computer exams
9. Take a computer exam, schedule another exam
10. Ensure that the children are adjusting well
11. Start new auto and rental insurance policies
12. Grocery shop from the beginning to fill a pantry and refrigerator
13. Buy kids' snow boots

There has to be more. I feel like I haven't breathed deeply in almost a month. To be fair to myself, many of the above mentioned things entailed many, many steps. This would explain the all-pervading sense of exhaustion I am experiencing.
Finding a job? It's a job in and of itself. Enrolling kids in public school in a district that is the most confusing I've ever seen? Two jobs. Ensuring that the children are well-adjusted? I'll never finish that one. Familiarizing myself with major streets? I have wasted more gas on U-turns and back tracking through parking lots than I used to drive here from Texas.
Okay, now that I have succeeded in relieving my brain of these lists, it's past time to sleep. See ya.

The Dreaded Colorado Winter

It turns out that winter in Colorado isn't so bad. Every time I told someone I was moving to Colorado, I got one consistent reaction: "Oh my gosh! You're going to freeze! It's so cold! Can you drive in the snow?!" And I just nodded along and said things like, "Yeah, I know. I think we can handle it. We'll get used to it." Secretly, I was wondering just how bad it would be.

I am happy to say that I have been pleasantly surprised. We've had a few small snow showers and one that was larger and included some freezing rain and sleet-type stuff. That was not fun but it didn't last long. The worst part is that driving on slushy streets quickly covered my vehicle in a thick layer of some of the nastiest dirt and grime I've ever seen. I twitched just looking at it and simply touching the door handle brought on a full-body shudder. Nasty.

You know how "they" say, "It's not the heat, it's the humidity"? Well, "they" are absolutely right. I learned this while living in West Texas because 100 degree heat isn't bad when the humidity is 10% and you can sit in the shade with a nice breeze. It's actually pleasant. What "they" don't usually say is, "It's not the cold, it's the humidity." But this is true, too. The air here is dry and cold which isn't nearly as bad as wet and cold.

The other good thing about dry air is that when the snow and ice melt, the water evaporates quickly. In wetter climes, the water would only make things worse by re-freezing into solid sheets of ice overnight. This doesn't often happen here.

So, there it is. Winter in Colorado isn't shocking or horrifying or freeze-your-bum-off cold. At least not that I've seen; nature could prank me tomorrow though, just for grins.

It's Out!!!

Miriam's first loose tooth fell out yesterday. She is unbelievably relieved to have the ordeal over with. We celebrated with great ceremony by placing the tooth carefully under her pillow last night and discussing what the Tooth Fairy might leave in its place. We also took a picture and she wrote on the calendar, "Miriams first gone tooth." (The grammar and word choice are hers entirely.)

By the way, my kids don't actually believe in the Tooth Fairy, just like they don't believe in Santa Claus. But we have discussed how sometimes it's fun to pretend and play games, even when we know the truth. This morning Miriam popped up at my bedside and said, "The Tooth Fairy didn't leave me anything!" I assured her that something must be there and went in search of the quarter. It was behind the bed.

Now, before you chastise me for leaving only a quarter, let me say that a quarter was great for me at 6 years old and so far, quarters have been great for my kids. I have no plans to explain inflation to them until all their baby teeth have fallen out.

An Actual Dream

Over there to the right, I mentioned that I usually don't remember dreams during the night. Today though, I remembered last night's dream all too clearly.

See, I had a job interview this morning at 10:30. I was apprehensive about it -- the recruiter sent me an e-mail with no fewer than 6 attachments containing everything from a summary of the agency's mission to pediatric competency tests -- and that spilled over into my sleeping hours.

In my dream, I suddenly glanced at a clock and saw that it was noon. As I scrambled for a phone to call the agency, I racked my brain for a plausible excuse for being an hour and a half late. But I couldn't find a phone and promptly forgot why I needed a phone anyway. Next thing I knew, I looked at the clock again and it was 3:00. Again, the mad dash for a phone and an excuse. The whole night continued like this until I woke at 5:00 (really awake this time!) and grabbed my phone off the bedside table. Thankfully, I did stop just short of actually dialing the agency. Great night's sleep, huh?

In case you're wondering, the interview went well, but I'm not sure it's what I am looking for. I'm a bit nervous about working for a home health agency in a city that I am not yet familiar with. Also, there's the whole weather constraint since the roads can get very bad here. But the coordinator liked me. There are all sorts of background checks to be completed and more documentation to turn in so it will be a while before I hear anything else from them.

I had another job lead waiting in my e-mail inbox this evening and it sounds interesting, too. Tomorrow, I am going to go to a couple of medical centers in this area and drop off my resume, fill out applications, the whole shebang. Things will continue turning up and eventually something will be exactly what I need.

Neglect

So, I haven't posted anything significant in a while. Things have been crazy hectic since before our arrival in Colorado. Between the last minute packing up, the traveling and the settling in, I've barely had a moment to collect my thoughts. What a whirlwind!

The last week of our Texas residency was spent in a flu-induced haze of fever, coughing and exhaustion. It was awful. Truly awful. The kids and I missed most of our going away stuff, which was very sad. It made the good-byes even sadder since we didn't get to say many of them.

Our friends came through in an amazing way to pack us up and see us off. I can't say enough how much I appreciated the help with getting boxes, the friends who took my kids for a bit so I could pack and the army of volunteers who loaded the U-Haul. I will not forget your helpfulness. (Although, I have wondered if maybe it was a bit of pushing to get us out of town? Totally kidding! Ha!)

And once again, I am reminded how great my family is. Dad took off three days of work, flew to Texas, drove the U-Haul to Colorado and then flew back home. On Super Bowl weekend. He's a great dad, huh? The Amazingtons, also known as Jennifer and Caleb, let us stay with them for a week. And then they made countless trips up and down the stairs to my second floor apartment to help me unload the U-Haul. My grandparents gifted me some much appreciated funds, without my asking. Three cheers for awesome family! I really could not have made this move without everyone. Come to think of it though, without family here, I wouldn't have moved here. Whatever.

We are getting settled in. Our new place is great. It's slightly larger than our last one and has great storage spaces -- a must for an organizational freak like myself. I took the kids to register for school today. We are fortunate to be in an excellent school district; I expect good things from it. I interview with a pediatric home health agency on Thursday morning. If that doesn't seem to be a good fit for me, there are a few other leads to follow. Luckily, nurses are always in demand. So, we are getting our bearings, one little baby step at a time.

I have to share a small victory. I got a bit lost looking for the school registration office today but decided to go with it and take the opportunity to get to know some other streets in the area. I am proud to say that I resisted calling for help in the form of Google maps and found my way back around all by myself! Sure, I drove in a few concentric circles around my goal, but I did it! Finding my way out of that neighborhood back to my own presented its own adventure too, but I pulled that one off fairly smoothly.

Next step: trade out my Texas tags for Colorado tags so that when I cut someone off in traffic (accidentally!), they don't think it's because I'm from out of town and don't know my way around.

A Huge Thank You!

I was too tired last night to remember all the people who came over to help me move on Saturday afternoon and evening. I expected a few people, but you all really out-did yourselves. We packed the truck in about 2 hours. I never expected it to get done that quickly. So, thank you to Travis, Michael, David W., Kelly, Luke, Maria, Julie, Niki, Cyndee, Harry and most especially to my dad! I am so grateful to you for all your help.

Colorado

We made it. I am tired. That is all for now.

Personalities and Loose Teeth

You can tell a lot about a child by the way they deal with their loose teeth. I have first- and second-hand experience with this. First, with myself and now with my own children.

The child who wiggles her tooth hesitantly with one finger and clamps her mouth shut at the first sign of anyone seeking to check on its progress tends to be a reserved, timid child. She knows the tooth will eventually fall out but there is no rush. After all, this is a big change and change is usually a very bad thing. It's perfectly okay to have an adult tooth sit right behind the baby tooth for weeks. This is the best way to adjust to this change.

The child who yanks and twists energetically at a loose tooth is the rambunctious, energetic, attention-seeking type. He takes every opportunity to open his mouth and show off his prize. The sooner that baby tooth is out, the sooner the Tooth Fairy brings his money, right? This child rarely, if ever, leaves a tooth hanging on by a thread because he will jerk it out first.

I got to thinking about this last week because Miriam has her first loose tooth. The adult tooth began making its appearance before Christmas. It's now almost completely in and looks very odd, sitting behind the baby tooth. She's like the human version of a 6-year-old shark. She is terrified that the thing is going to fall out while she's asleep, or worse, at school. Oh, the horror! She refuses to bite food with the teeth in the middle of her mouth; everything is eaten from the side of her mouth. She brushes that tooth and the ones around it very gingerly, if at all.

Solomon, on the other hand, has lost about 7 teeth in the last two years. He even once pulled out 3 teeth in the span of about 10 days. The child is a maniac when it comes to loosing teeth. He loves it. He pestered me constantly, long before his sixth birthday until he finally had his first loose tooth. "Mom, when am I going to lose a tooth?" "Mom, this tooth is a tiny bit loose!" "Hey, did that tooth just move?" He's constantly checking the remaining baby teeth for any possibility of instability.

It remains to be seen how Samuel will deal with loose teeth. But from watching the way he handles most other things in his day to day life, I think he'll fall some where between the furious yanker and the tentative wiggler. He will be alternately excited and disgusted by it. He may eventually screw up his courage and yank one out quickly. He'll regret it when it bleeds a bit and remember it for the rest of his life as a mortal mistake.

In case you're wondering, I was the timid type. I hated the idea of loosing teeth. There was that oddly disgusting, fascinating sensation of a part of my body moving. On its own. Gross. There was the possibility that there would be blood when it finally came out. And of course, there was the chance that it would fall out while I was asleep and then I would swallow it. Grosser still.

I am still unnerved by most things having to do with teeth. I have this recurring nightmare in which my teeth begin disentigrating and falling out one after the other, until it is all I can do to spit out bits of enamel and dentin. Disgusting. I can't help but think that's a holdover from being 8 years old and wiggling a tooth with my tongue and suddenly it just fell out of the socket on its own and I had to spit it out.

Frick on a stick

I spoke too soon. Or maybe I didn't knock on wood or something. I am sick. Well and truly sick. There is so much stuff to do around here and I do not have the energy to do it. And I got a flu shot. This is not fair.

Besides the bodyache, headache, coughing and complete lack of energy, the worst symptom is being hungry and having no appetite whatsoever. I want to eat but nothing sounds good. Okay, I am going to pout on the couch.

Shameless Bragging

Solomon is at the top of his class in all subjects, except reading. He has struggled a bit while trying to make the transition from reading in Spanish to reading in English. He gets extra time every week to work with a reading teacher in both languages. I am so proud of him. He is very athletic and is the most imaginative kid I know, too.

Miriam made it on to the A Honor Roll! She reads extremely well in both English and Spanish. She has come a long way this year in relating to people outside our family. A year ago, she was so painfully shy that she refused to speak to most people. I love watching her giggle and talk with a variety of people now. She has an amazing capacity for empathy and compassion.

Samuel's speech was evaluated at the beginning of this school year and it was determined that he had a slight articulation problem. He has been in therapy and has mastered /f/, /v/ and /s/. He had his first session this week since the holiday break and this is the note I got: "Samuel is doing great all on his own now." He also recognizes most numbers up to 10, at least half the letters in the alphabet and counts -- get this -- backwards! He is an affectionate, engergetic child with more friends than I thought a 4-year-old could have.

I feel so fortunate to have such perfectly amazing children. Being their mother is the most challenging, rewarding, frustrating and satisfying thing I could ever do. I am so grateful to be on this journey with them and I cannot wait to see where it takes us all.

Somebody More Like You & Definitely Not Me

I love those moments in life when irony and hilarity combine to form a coincidence of such perfection and clarity that I almost can't believe it. And with that, I give you a song that is my new favorite song, at least for this week.
Lyrics from Nickel Creek ...

I didn't hear you say you're sorry
The fault must be mine
I wish you all the best of luck at

Finding somebody more like you

You said you'd love me always, truly
I must have changed
Cause you don't need me like you used to
I hope you find somebody more like you

I hope you finally find someone
Someone that you trust
And give him everything
I hope you meet someone your height
So you can see eye-to-eye
With someone as small as you

You came out of nowhere, made me smile
Then tore me in two
Saying, "We're very different people"
So dear, I hope you find somebody more like you

I hope you find somebody more like you.

Maybe We're Just Here

Dinner conversation last night in our home --

Miriam: Why don't Aunt Jennifer and Uncle Caleb go to church?
Me: I guess they don't want to.
Miriam: They don't believe in God?
Me: I don't know if that's why they don't go to church, but some people don't believe in God.
Miriam: I believe in God.
Me: Why?
Miriam: Because he made us ... actually, I don't know who made us. Maybe we're just here.

PSA

When 6-year-old girls get together, they can spray an astounding amount of cheap perfume. So much that you can smell it on the other end of the house, through a bathroom, the bathroom's closed door, a bedroom, living room and another bedroom. Even when the little girls have not ventured from the bathroom since the spraying began.

I know this now and I thought you might like to know, too. I am considering opening all the windows in the house, even thought it's about 40 degrees. Yes, it's that bad.

Rambling About Nothing Much

As it turns out, I'm not as sick as I thought I was. Yay for flu shots! It is rather annoying, however to walk around for three days, feeling as if I need to sneeze all the time.

I like this packing up process. It's good to have the opportunity to go through all my stuff and throw out useless stuff. I love simplifying my life this way. I have made two trips to Goodwill this month. I've also taken numerous loads of stuff to the dumpster outside.

Pandora.com is one of the coolest sites I have come across. You can search for a music artist you really like and they'll offer other choices in a similar genre. From there, I can search for them on Project Playlist and create a playlist to fit my current mood.

I met an internet friend IRL yesterday. (IRL means "in real life" -- 'cause you know, the internet isn't actually real and has no bearing on my life.) It was very cool. She and I have known each other online for a few years now. It was sort of surreal to see this person that knows some very private stuff about me, in the flesh for the first time.

I think I need to drop BCIS. It's that computer class that I was told I have to have. Looking at the book and the syllabus has struck fear into my poor little heart. I need something a little less stressful right now.

And that brings us to the end of this episode of Rambling About Nothing Much. Stay tuned for the next installment which could well feature musings about the dust bunnies I am sure to encounter when I move my furniture out of this place.

Edited to say ... for some reason this post says it was on Friday, January 18. I actually posted it on Sunday, January 20. I'm not sure what's going on with that.

The Dreaded 'F' Word

I can feel it coming. My head aches in that dull way that I almost wouldn't notice unless I have to turn suddenly. My shoulders are tight, only I haven't done anything to make them that way. My nose isn't stuffy but it's definitely not normal. My hands feel cold when the rest of me feels just a tad too warm. I can feel that inner chill, almost like my muscles are too cold for my skin.

I'm off to suck down some Airborne and then snuggle up in bed. I hate the flu.

How to be Happy

I got a message from my uncle this morning. It's an e-mail forward. I generally do not like e-mail forwards. They usually fall into one of a few categories: dooms-sayer chain letters, absurd horoscopes, cute kid quotes that were obviously made up by adults, politically motivated sensationalist 'articles,' or trite observations about life. I suppose this one could be categorized as a trite observation about life, but I like it anyway.

It's the one about the elderly gentleman moving into a nursing home. He philosophizes that the happiness you get from life is proportionate to the expectations you put into it. Now, I don't for a minute believe this specific scenario actually occurred but someone had a point in making it up.

Anyway, I had seen it before, but this morning I noticed something that I must have glossed over previously. At the end were some rules for being happy. I'm not saying that life is always this simple, but there is some truth to them.

They are:

• free your heart from hatred
• free your mind from worries
• live simply
• give more
• expect less

One could sum up the 5 into 1: live simply. To me, living simply means not harboring hatred, not worrying about the things you can't change, giving of yourself and expecting little to nothing in return.
I have attempted to do these things in the last year or two and I have found that it's quite fulfilling. I have better relationships with friends, family, co-workers and the parents of students I work with. I have made more friends and become closer to the ones I already had. I have expected more from myself than from anyone else. As a result, I am much happier with myself and my lot in life. This could be a coincidence, but I highly doubt it.

The Witching Hour

I don't know if you've noticed this, or if you'd ever notice this without my pointing it out ... but all my posts thus far, save the first, have been posted in the 10 pm hour. What is it about 10:00 that causes me to write?

Could it be that this is simply when I finally have time to sit down and do it? Maybe melatonin levels have something to do with my creativity. (Not that I think I am all that creative. It's more a desire to share my life with the rest of the internet. Sort of a reverse voyuerism. Is there a word for that? Exhibitionism? Whoa. Let's not go there.) Is it a hang over from last semester when I did all my writing for English in time to submit assignments before midnight?

Interesting thoughts to ponder. Interesting for me, anyway. Probably less so for you.

The Impossible is Done

There occasionally comes a point when what needs to be done isn't the easiest thing to do. There also occasionally comes a point when what needs to be done is in the best interest of a dearly loved one. When those two points coincide, one must make the decision to do this thing because it is in the best interest of the dearly loved one, even though it may seem impossible. This is what must be done.

Some Things I Will Miss

I will miss a lot of things about this place. Some things are obvious: friends, my job, our church, the library. I will miss the friendly openness and small town community feeling. I will miss knowing all the 'short cuts' and feeling like I know most of what there is to know about this town.

Other things aren't so obvious. They are the smaller, inconspicuous things that I am afraid I will forget because they don't stick in my mind all the time. Here are a few.


This is the sunset view from my front door. I have seen that sky in every imaginable shade of pink, orange, yellow, purple and blue. I know there will be more sunsets in more places, but I'm going to miss this one.


These are the two trees I can see from my office window. In the spring and summer they are green and lush. In the fall they turn brilliant shades of crimson, scarlet and gold. They always make me smile, as they are among the few truly beautiful trees in this desert.


The kids and I have watched -- and attempted to catch -- frogs, turtles, ducks, dragon flies and fish in and around this pond.


Believe it or not, I will miss these big, green fluff balls. They are what eventually dry up, get ripped out of the ground and make tumbleweeds. They can be pretty huge, too. I dragged one out of the street last week that was well over 4 feet across. They're kind of fun to run over with your car if they aren't huge.


This playground is one of the coolest ever. All the play structures are made from welded rebar and sheet metal. The other end of the playground has an airplane with slides coming out of it. Awesome.



How could one not miss this? It's a Texas-size longhorn skull. Pure Texas class right there, ladies and gentlemen. And yeah, there's a little part of me that will miss it.

There are lots of things I will not miss -- dust storms, constant wind, scorpions and stifling summer heat are a few that come to mind. I will not miss the lack of rain or the brown grass. I will not miss the thick odor of oil wells. At least for a while. Something tells me that I might look back on a few of these things with a sort of fondness, once I've been away from them for a bit.  But for the things I will miss ... I only hope that I will get back here for a visit occasionally.