Recent Kid Quotes

Me:  Samuel, put the sword down! Put on your shoes! You're going to be late for school!
Samuel:  But ...
Me:  Put it down!
Samuel:

... later ...

Samuel:  You know why I carry around the sword all the time?
Me:  No, why?
Samuel:  It's because of the monsters and I feel a little bit safer with the sword.
Me:  So your squishy Nerf sword is going to be protection against a zombie or vampire or other monster?  How does that work?
Samuel:  Well, the monsters are imaginary, you know.

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Miriam:  I don't think medicine makers have ever tasted real fruit.  Ever.  That does not taste like grapes!

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Solomon:  I think electrons are the key to time travel.
Me:  Why?
Solomon:  Because they can move at incredible speeds and blahblah science blahblah theories about physics and space blahblah.  Doesn't that make sense?
Me:  Um, I guess?  Where did you come up with this?
Solomon:  From science.

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Okay, so that last conversation was mostly paraphrased because my child's knowledge about space, physics and all that surpasses my own.